If you can change only one thing for children when their parents split up, change the way their parents treat one another. When parents act like enemies, they are abusing their own children in the process. Parents who are civil and decent to one another spare their children the worst aspects of divorce. Shari Delisle, Ph.D.

Cooperative Parenting focuses on the relationship between parents who are living apart, and are jointly raising their children. Parents may be divorced or never married but if they care about their children, they need to “build a sturdy bridge” between their two homes as their children grow and develop. The overarching goal is to protect and support children by teaching their parents (and other caregivers) information and skills to:  

A)          Reduce or eliminate conflict between parents.
B)          Achieve emotional detachment and business-like rapport.
B)          Establish or improve communication between parents.
C)          Decrease reliance on family court for solving problems
              and resolving disputes.
D)          Encourage parents’ willingness to accept greater personal
             responsibility for creating a good working alliance with the
             other parent.     
E)          Give parents practical ideas and skills for extinguishing
             hostility and increasing cooperation between all the adults
             in the life of the child.  

Background

Cooperative Parenting was created in 2000 by Dr. Shari Delisle for parents who need expert guidance as they raise their children in separate homes. Parenting is a difficult job with too little training. This is true for co-parenting too. Learning to be a healthy and decent co-parent is vital to a child’s well-being and healthy development. In her twenty years of divorce counseling, coaching and teaching, Dr. Delisle, has focused her professional attention on empowering parents to become reasonable colleagues rather than bitter adversaries.

This “intensive”workshop is three weeks (7.5 hours) of in-class time. More than 5,500 parents have graduated since 2000. Some of their comments can be found in the section titled “What Parents Say About Cooperative Parenting”. Other important information:  

    a. Tuition is sliding scale and based upon parents’ household income.
        The tuition schedule is found on the registration form.
    b. Tuition can be paid in three installments. Master Card and
        Visa accepted.
    c. Classes are available in convenient locations throughout San
        Diego County – Chula Vista, La Mesa, Clairemont Mesa, Encinitas
        and Escondido.
    d. One parent attends a class. Guests are urged to participate with
        a parent and if they would like a graduation certificate, a guest’s
        tuition is discounted 50% of the parent’s tuition.
    e. Four classes are available each month
    f.  Half of class participants are court-ordered to attend
    g. Make-ups for missed classes are possible
    h. Group size ranges from 6 – 20 participants per class
     i. No child care is available
     j. Graduation certificate is given during final of three sessions  

A variety of teaching techniques are used to promote learning.
These include:

      * Lectures
      * Video
      * Parent Handbook
      * Role Plays
      * Group Discussion
      * Homework Activities  

Graduate Statistics

      * 88% of graduates state they were less likely to engage in
         conflict with one another following participation in
         Cooperative Parenting
      * 41% reported they were mandated to attend, but believed
         they gained a great deal of needed information and were glad
         they came
      * 79% of graduates rated their satisfaction level as “HIGH”
      * 85% of graduates said that participation had positively changed
         their attitudes and behavior
      * 35% of graduates said they were less likely to go to court
         in the future